Putting The 'Fun' Into 'Funeral! It's A Micro Adventure!
Or maybe we should call it "Three Funerals and a Resurrection"? But here's the second in a series of when-I-have-time-and/or-inspiration Micro Adventures.
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Space Year 2001:
: "We gather here today to mourn and remember three of our dead. Firstly, Nate Grey, the X-Man, our Mutant Shaman."
: "Scott, our son-from-an-alternate-reality, he's dead!"
: "My son, my only son!"
: "I'm standing right here, dammit!"
: "We stopped counting you because you're older than me. It's just weird."
: And as sad as it is, Nate's death proves that any one of us could die at any time."
: "Jean, if anything ever happens to me, promise me you'll leave the X-Men and become a nun. You know I'd do the same for you."
: "You'd become a nun for me?"
: "......."
: "Would any of you like to say anything about poor dead Nate?"
: "No, but I've got something to say about my clone, Stryfe, who also recently died."
: "Go ahead."
: "Stryfe. He was an evil *@#&^. And then he died. The end."
: "Nathan! That's no way to talk about your clone!"
: "Ah, it's not like he won't come back. He always does."
: "I'm standing right here, dammit!"
: "And now, we remember Psylocke, also recently taken from us."
: *cries*
: "And take it from someone who only looks like a demon, the way we'll all remember Psylocke is as a demon in the sack."
: "Best there was at what she did, bub."
: "You knows it!"
: "By the Goddess, yes!"
: "......."
: "With Psylocke, I didn't need my power to get lucky."
: "Gambit, he have to agree."
: "Gambit!?!?"
: "It...happen before Gambit, he ever meet you, I gar-on-tee."
: "I'm a cop!"
: "......."
: "In words of one syllable, she was the best."
: "I have to agree."
: "Professor?!?!"
: "I don't have to justify myself to you."
: "See what you made me miss, Jean?"
: "And you're the only one here who did."
: "Weren't you in jail until after she died?"
: "I got visitors."
: "......."
: "So we're all agreed on Betsy's 'special talents'?"
: "Oh yeah!"
: "So....you guys...all heard about that, then?"
: "And now, we remember Colossus. Our old foe, Sinister, has offered to clone him, if we all contribute some of the necessary money."
"Who?"
: "Colossus."
: "Colosso? The original team's training robot?"
: "No, one of your X-Men, who recently died?"
: "We just talked about Psylocke and X-Man, bub."
: "Colossus! Shadowcat's first love!"
: "Pete Wisdom died? Again? Already?"
: "Come on, people! Colossus! Guy who turned into metal?"
: "Metals? Magneto? He never stays dead!"
: "Believe it!"
: "Big Russian guy?"
: "....Russian guy? Metal? .....Omega Red? Omega Red died, and you're having a funeral for him? Are you nuts?"
: "Oh, screw you guys, I'm going home!"
: "No! Screw you! You remember these bums, but all I got was an alien autopsy!"
*later*
: "So, did you get the money?"
: "No, they're not interested. I'll pay on my own, but it'll take some time."
: "Very well. But you get nothing until I am fully paid."
: "I think that'll be about...three years from now. And how do we explain his return to everyone? If we admit he's a clone, they'll just consider him
expendable. Cannon-fodder. We always treat clones like some sub-human race."
: "It should be simplicity itself to convince your fellow X-Men that my clone is the genuine article, despite his cremation."
: "And how will we manage that?"
: "Oh...uh...aliens. We'll just say aliens did it."
The above is a parody. All characters ™ © Marvel Comics.
All micros property of their respective designers - if you want to be credited, e-mail microadv (at-sign) graffiti.net.